Wheeee! First Chrono Trigger fic! Go me! XD not!
Jeff: ... what?
Analyn: I was against over-medication in schools right up until I read this line.
Summary: Lucca starts to have different feelings about Crono and shes not sure quite how to deal with them.
Analyn: Different. So, any sort of feeling.
Eddie: She could feel, say, hungry about Crono.
Jeff: Or motivated about Crono.
Analyn: Know what? I feel like we're in for a crapfest.
Jeff: Is that really a different feeling about fanfiction?
Time period: 2004 A.D. (since they didnt have karaoke machines or DVD players or popcorn makers in 1600 A.D. XD)
Eddie: They didn't have Crono, Marle and Lucca in 2004 AD, though!
Jeff: Didn't the game take place in 1000 AD?
Analyn: Now I feel like I'm going to have to get out my canon stick.
Disclaimer: I do own a copy of Chrono Trigger (well my dad does, anyway), but I dont own it. DARNIT!!!!!!!! XP I do also own a copy of Titanic, but I dont own that, either. :sniff:
Jeff: I own the first season of the Golden Girls on DVD, do you see me talking about that?
Eddie: You own what?!
Jeff: I view it as a documentary of bad 80s fashion.
Just a small FYI:
Analyn: We know you can't really tell what's bold and what's not, so we'll help you out.
Jeff: "Talking." "Talking!"
Analyn: Why fanfic, I thought you put tildes and asterisks around speech, ~*like this*~, but gee, YOU'VE SHOWN ME A BETTER WAY!
Eddie: This author assumes that we've never played the game or read anything, ever, doesn't she.
Something very important I want to stand out
Something less important I want to stand out
Something very very important I want to stand out
Analyn: This is all bold in the original, as are the next three lines.
Jeff: This amazes me too. Wow, author, I had no idea boldface stood out! This would be a logical explanation to a blind person.
Eddie: Hey, wait, she only uses this one once.
Jeff: Yeah, hey, and this one is only in the author's notes!
Analyn: [author] If I put more words in my story, people will read it! Then I'll get more reviews and also puppies, candy and fireworks!
(me wanting to tell you something)
Eddie: No, fanfic, no, no, no author's notes in the text, please, no, it hurts, it just does ...
warnings::something I think happened, but I dont know. Im just going by what Ive seen and heard from my dad playing
Jeff: What does that even mean?
Analyn: Wait! She didn't even play the game?! Look at that, the author just admitted to hearing this story secondhand!
Eddie: You'll kill me, right?
Jeff: You're not leaving me here alone, you half-wit! If I have to sit through this, so do you!
Eddie: Well, I guess that would be -- HEY!
NOTE ALSO:: MY HANDS WERE VERY cold at the time I wrote this, so please excuse any errors of mine (and constant references to cold things).
Analyn: I'm already pissed at you for not playing the game, so no, I don't think I will. Sorry, type with gloves next time.
SPOILER!!!!!!! This is after Frog becomes Glenn again. If you dont know what I mean (and want to find out on your own)
Jeff: You ... you just told us exactly what happens! What's so hard to understand!?
Eddie: It's like someone distilled stupid.
dont continue this fic!!!!!!!! I WILL MAKE MANY REFERENCES TO THIS!!!!!!!!!!
Analyn: In the original, this wasn't bold. Oh my gosh, though! Is this supposed to stand out a little or a lot?! I'm so lost!
Chapter 1Feelings begin
Eddie: I guess she warmed her hands up.
Jeff: Ba-da bing.
Eddie: I'll be here all week.
Lucca discarded a large wad of Kleenex tissues.
Jeff: That's hot.
She, Marle and Tama (Chrono Trigger OC; shes Cronos sister.)
Analyn: If Crono doesn't have a damn fine reason for having a sister, I'm getting my canon stick.
Jeff: Wait, Crono didn't have a dad ... ?
Eddie: Maybe Gato got lonely.
had just watched the movie Titanic. Crono had originally started out the movie with them, and so had Glenn, but theyd both fallen asleep, not caring much about the chic flick.
Jeff: Because they're guys. Manly guys! Heck, they're MEN.
Eddie: [sings] They're men in tights!
Jeff and Eddie: [sings] Tights! Tights!
(I warned you.
Eddie: About ... ?
You kept reading, didnt you?
Analyn: You're ... you're yelling at me for reading your writing!? "I told you not to read this work I put on the Internet! PS plz read/review kthx."
Oh well, might as well continue if you ignored my warning. Yes, friends, Frog is now a human. His name is actually Glenn.)
Jeff: Really, didn't you tell us that in the author's notes, pretty much? Look at that, over there in the sky!
Analyn: It's a bird!
Eddie: It's a plane!
All: IT'S CAPTAIN OBVIOUS OF THE 'APPARENT' BRIGADE!
Tama and Marle had slowly dozed off, and Tama had leaned up cozily against Glenn. All three girls had cried,
Analyn: Because girls cry at movies. Men, though, they can't even see the movie from their huge penises. Excuse me, I have to go get pregnant, take off my shoes, and spend the day in the kitchen.
Jeff: You can cook for me, but please don't expect me to get you --
Analyn: Stop talking, Jeff.
but the song at the end had made Lucca thinka lot.
Eddie: [Lucca] OWW OWW OWW OWW OWW.
It made her think about Cronoher childhood friend. About how happy she was when she was around himlike those cheesy, warm, fuzzy feelingslike Rose and Jack from the movie.
Jeff: It also made her think about forming proper sentences. She should get on learning how to do that, she thought.
She chuckled softly as she watched him snore quietly, his hand still in the popcorn. Making sure that Tama and Marle were still asleep, she ran her fingers through Cronos copper-colored hair. He moaned softly.
Jeff: Oh good. You know what I did this morning? I woke up and said to myself, "Self, I really want to read about creepy pseudo Rape!Lucca today." And here we are! Dreams really do come true with fanfiction.
Oh, god! What am I DOING?! Im so stupid
Eddie: What do you want us to do, argue? That kind of crap can get you put up on charges!
She walked out to the back deck at Tama and Cronos house,
Jeff: Which they had in the game OH WAIT NO THEY DIDN'T.
perching herself at the edge of the rail like Rose had done in the movie when she was feeling suicidal. She wondered: If I fell, would Crono pull me back up?
Analyn: If you let us push you, we'll find out.
I jump, you jump
All: We all jump for ice cream!
That was what Jack had told Rose. And hed meant it, too.
Eddie: ... so?!
Jeff: I can't put my finger on WHY the Titanic references make this fic bad, they just do.
She sighed. Everything was so confusing.
Analyn: Yeah. Jumping. That really gets me sometimes, what with the up and down motion and all.
Hey, Lucca? Crono came up behind her, still half-asleep.
Eddie: Fifteen in the penalty box!
Analyn: There is no way that Crono talks. He's the most famous silent character in all of video game-dom!
Eddie: Him and Link.
Jeff: So help me, if Serenity comes out of the woodwork...
Lucca jumped about a foot into the air.
Analyn: I thought that confused her.
GOD! she yelled, turning quickly.
Jeff: [God] What? Seriously, you either need me or you don't, pick one.
She screamed as she lost her balance, and that was a pretty high up deck. They were at least five floors up.
Eddie: Crono lived in a small house in the game! Where did the Crono Family Mansion come from?
H-help me! she cried out, her cold hands still gripping the deck railing.
Analyn: When did she fall completely off? And when did she grab the rails?
Jeff: And why do we have to read Titanic Reinvented?
She was sure she was going to fall until two warm hands grasped her own.
LUCCA! Hang on! Ill pull you back up! Crono was wide awake now, no doubt.
Analyn: Raise your hand if you're surprised. Anyone? Anyone?
She screamed, and felt a bit of vomit creep up her throat.
Eddie: Eww! Did we need to know that?
Jeff: Why do I have this sudden fear that this is gonna get real kinky real quick?
Tama and Marle came running out back. Glenn still snored on the floor.
Analyn: Vital to the story, that one is.
Tama panicked. Anything we can do, Crono-onii-chan? (Onii-chanbig brother)
Jeff: Okay, look here, fanfic authors. Every time you use bad fake Japanese, God is going to kill a kitten. Do you hear me? No, wait, forget that, He has enough to worry about -- I, Jeff, will personally kill a kitten. I'll do it, I'll snap their little fuzzy necks every time I come across bad fangirl Japanese. Do you hear me?! Don't mess with me, authors, you know I'll do it.
Analyn: Oh crap. What with her being nuzzled against Glenn earlier and all, I'm starting to worry that Tama is our Mary Sue.
Yeah! HELP ME PULL HER UP! Crono snapped.
With the combined efforts of Crono, Tama, and Marle, all three pulled Lucca up.
Eddie: That was riveting.
Not much was said
Analyn: Because that would take time to type.
as all three got ready to go to bed that night (Glenn was still sound asleep),
Jeff: Crono, Tama, Lucca nd Marle make three?
at least until Crono said, Look guys, its really late, so why dont you all stay hereIN OUR OWN ROOMS, Marle.
Analyn: Well, between Rapist!Lucca and HornySchoolGirl!Marle, it's good to know I can die a broken, sad human being.
Eddie: [Tama] Am I a Mary Sue with no real significance to the plot whatsoever?
What about Glenn? Tama uneasily pointed at the once-frog sleeping by the couch.
Jeff: What about Glenn?
Analyn: Okay, author, I'll level with you. Fic writing 101. We don't care about Glenn. No one does. Tama, Marle, they're all throwaway characters. We care about what Lucca's thinking, saying and doing right now, since you've lead us to believe that she is the focus of said fic. Does she want to thank Crono? Is she scared right now? Maybe happy? I don't know! I won't know UNTIL YOU TELL US. This is your job! If you want a Tama and Glenn fic, make one! Just pick a topic and stay with it, gee whiz.
Uhm leave him there, I guess?
But its freezing out there! Marle protested.
Fine, Crono said grumpily. So why dont YOU go out there and stay with him? he snapped at Marle.
Eddie: Because. It's. Freezing. Out. There.
Ew. Marle crinkled her nose in disgust.
Tama smacked her lightly on the arm. Dont be so mean!
Well, why dont YOU go out there, Tama?! Marle whined. You two are practically engaged, anyway! Tama glowered at Marle, but Crono noticed that she was slightly happy as she ran out to the living room.
Analyn: Who was happy as who ran out of what living room?
Eddie: There are questions not even keys can answer.
Analyn: Bah, I stopped caring about five lines up.
That was the end of chapter one gomen, gomen
Jeff: That's it! Kitten, dead!
my hands are FREEZING! I have to turn on the heater soon Chapter two coming up soon!!!!!!! I promise!
Analyn: Interesting that it's not on FF.net. This is an observation, not a complaint.