When I was learning MiSTing a long, long time ago (it's like a trade, a craft, a delicate tradition to me, handed down from masters before ... shaddap), one of the cardinal rules I was taught was that you never make the MiSTing itself a personal attack on the author. We're here to laugh and have fun at bad fanfiction, not be mean to each other. That being said, this is the first fic I've ever done that had a really blindingly obvious Mary Sue, and she gave me trouble. Every time I made fun of our self-insertion protagonist, there was a little voice inside me, screaming, "YOU DO NOT DO THAT! PERSONAL EQUALS NO!" I tried, and this is the best I did.
Also, back in my MiSTing apprentice days, I learned that some fic is just too bad to do. This fic, I would say, dances on that line a little bit. You'll see.
It's a Pokemon piece. Oh yes. It's by a certain Michelle, or Trombones^Baritones^Tubas, as she's known on Fanfiction.net. I got a heads up about her from zeldabadfic, as apparently she writes crappy mushy fics about her and Link. I've read some of her other works, and yeah, it's all juuuuust about like this turd. Some common themes of hers include video game worlds crossing into the real world (so her Mary Sue can meet and possibly be in love with one of the characters), video game characters becoming upset that they're not real in her world for whatever hairbrained reason, and describing things as being red as a tomato. You'll see all these things in the fic today.
I should probably kill myself for being so studied in a bad fanfic author's style, but let's ignore that and move on.
In this piece, we're presented with a tuba player named Mica. Mica loves her Pokemon. A lot. There's subtle hints in the fic that suggest that she prefers pokemon to real humans, which, for a Mary Sue which should be picture perfect, strikes me as mildly hilarious. In fact, if Mica is like her author counterpart, then I think someone might stay at home for their senior prom if you catch my drift.
Also, this thing's got the worst last line I've ever seen. I doubt it will ever be topped. You'll see, just truck through to the end.
I'd say more, but it's all in the obscenely long author's notes. Here, I present to you: The Marching Band Accident.